All emotions have a life. They are a function of, among many other things, time. This means that every emotion felt will die out. You can feel the same emotion again, at another time, for another reason. Like an engine, it needs refueling, or it will cease to exist at a later stage.
Happiness, anger, sadness and all other emotions are bound by the time. They start, flourish and then end. There is no emotion that is perpetual, every emotion joined by an umbilical cord to the time.
So if every emotion is a subject of time, is love any different?
Does love also die out with time? Does it also come with an expiry date? And if it is true, then why do we attach so much importance to it, importance to falling in love?
There was a time when I believed in the eternal love. The love which exists until infinity. The forever love. That was also the time when I was watching the popular sitcom “FRIENDS”. Of many themes recurring in that show, the on-off love affair between Ross and Rachel was one of the major ones. Many times the beloved characters fell in love, and then an equal number of times fell out of it.
And for most of the time, it was Rachel’s erratic treatment of love.
She would love Ross for one instant, and for other her love for him would just vanish. “I just don’t love you anymore” – one could hear her saying many times on the ten-year long show.
I would wonder at her behavior then. Surprised at how she can just do a switch on and off when it comes to love. One moment she would go all the way to England, look at Ross like lovers meeting after years of separation, and eventually causing the blunder during vows exchange that would break Ross’s marriage, and would come back to New Yor and forget everything.
For a teenager who gave high currency to love, this was hard to believe.
But the winds of time chaffs not only our bodies but also our thinking and perspective about this world.
Recently I met a girl and fell in love with her (it felt like love), only to fall out of it in a couple of weeks. I felt so much effort talking to her then. But in the couple of weeks that I endured in that loveless relationship, the flame of love again rekindled inside my heart.
This made me thinking about the bigger question. Do we attach too much weight to this feeling of love? Aren’t respect, and faith much better candidate to be considered when we are considering a life partner for us? Why does this feeling of love -which can die out quickly than a day’s life of a mayfly eclipse everything else? Does eternal love exist?
I don’t have an answer for all this, but one thing I’ve come to realize that it is true – that love is not a noun, something that we have. Love is a verb, something that we need to do, something we need to keep on working on, trying to make better, trying to put efforts to. It needs work, from both the sides, something which keeps the flame of love alive. Otherwise, love is nothing but a candle lit in a cold storm -unprotected, ready to extinguish at any time.