There are only a few things in this world that really unites (or divides) the whole world. Religion is one of them. War is another. But one thing that transcends everything from geography to race, language, color, and gender, is Love. More specifically – realization of love.
The most beautiful thing about love is that it does not have a defined beginning in time or a condition in space. You can’t say that today is the day I will fall in love. Or I will fall in love with her only if they have so and so quality. It does not work like this. It never has. It never will.
What happens instead is that you wake up one fine day, doing things you have been doing like any other day, eating the same food, walking the same path and meeting the same people. But then something will happen. Something you’d never planned or thought or hoped. While talking to that ‘one individual’ you will realize that something is special, something is different.
You will realize that when you around them you lose track of time, care least about the others around you. You are happier, and funnier. Words come out spontaneously from your mouth. There are neither awkward pauses, nor clumsy words.
And this will happen without your knowledge.
For love comes like a thief into your life with silent steps, and hushed breath, you being totally unaware of its intrusion, lost in your own life and then when it is deep inside your comfortable zone, it will invariably make a sound, and you will open your eyes, in sudden realization of reality. The difference being that you’ll not be afraid anymore. You will be in love instead.
Now you may say that love at first sight happens. And you know that it is true love at that moment. But in my view, love at first sight is very rarely ‘love’ at first sight. It can be ‘crush’ at first sight, or ‘infatuation’ at first sight. But never love.
What you experience in those moments of infatuation is a phenomenon that is just a manifestation of attraction, may be physical or intellectual. Or any other quality, it does not matter. And this infatuation starts a kind of chase, chase to get that person. And chase always thrills us. It fills our head with all sort of chemicals that excites us, and we think it is love.
It is only when the euphoria of that chase has ended, the excitement long gone that real love surfaces, if there was any love in the first place. And this kind of love never announces its onset.
I’m saying this because I have felt it. It was last summer when I was talking to her. It was the most common of the evenings, she and I out for a tea at a tuck shop outside our office. I think we were talking about the day went by. It couldn’t have been more ordinary.
We were sitting at a corner, under the trees. I was facing the road, the evening crowd presenting a background to her sitting in front of me. And she made a remark, kind of a joke on something that happened in office, and started laughing. At that moment as her childlike laugh resonated in my ears, time slowed down a bit, the background noise disappeared. And I looked at her like I had never seen her before.
She continued her talk about the office, but my mind was lost, everything else became immaterial, and I looked at her and realized, that I love her.
And I knew that it was not a beginning of something, not a beginning of love. It was a realization of love. That I was in love. A realization that I had been in love for a long time.
Yes, there were no violins playing in the back. No background music. No godsend words to tell me that I had fallen in love. It was just a realization of love.
It was then everything started making sense -the talks that seemed to be neverending, the long walks in the night, why it always felt like spring when I was around her, why a small smile on her face lighten up my entire day. Everything made sense then.
And this realization of love is both liberating and binding at once. Because at that moment you realize you have a connection with them that is beyond words and explanations, beyond rational logic and conscious thinking. It is, in fact, beyond everything you have learnt till now about life or love.
Only those who have felt it, those who have truly tasted it understand what love truly means, its real effect. For words can only indicate, can tell you only the symptoms of love, but not the actual feeling of love that is magical and sublime and a feeling unlike anything else in this whole world.
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